Its been a pretty good week so far. I feel pretty good. Hopefully stuff gets figured out and school gets better.
Bought a new dress. Will debut it tomorrow for dinner and when i attend the vision performance. Final year!
I just finished watching How to Train Your Dragon w/ Stephanie. It was much better than expected! I want a toothless!
Currently eating blue moo cookie dough icecream. a pint. yum. so much for all the exercise i've been doing!....
yum.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Past is Past.
When people talk and make references to the past so much it makes me wonder if they want to go back or are that unhappy with the present. or just feel that badly about it.
past is past.
present is present.
the two change the future.
I hope I know what I am doing.
past is past.
present is present.
the two change the future.
I hope I know what I am doing.
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Late productivity
Yeah...The weekend in general has been good. Thoughts to self.
Happiness is a choice. It is not always easy.
Some people are annoying and have no tact.
Ignorance is a bliss.
Nobody likes feeling ignored and insignificant.
I don't want to end up a home-body right now, I am too young for that.
I like food.
I need to worry less because there is always something I don't know and I'm going to have to accept that.
Happiness is a choice. It is not always easy.
Some people are annoying and have no tact.
Ignorance is a bliss.
Nobody likes feeling ignored and insignificant.
I don't want to end up a home-body right now, I am too young for that.
I like food.
I need to worry less because there is always something I don't know and I'm going to have to accept that.
Saturday, March 20, 2010
3 good nights and more to come.
Tuesday:
It's saturday...now what?
I am sleep deprived. Caffeinated.
I guess I should do homework. Then shower....and we'll see what tonight brings.
- Tried going to Tonic w/ Jennie but it was closed.
- Bdubs had a bunch of old men watching basketball.lame.
- Sushi Nara bar was a good time. We were the only two girls at the bar, had food, and Nagaritas. Anything that tastes good, I drink like I drink water. Bad. At least one was free.
- Went to the library to be motivation for Josh and his homework.
- Was not helpful at all.
- Felt sick.
- Went home.
- Got sick.
- Felt better.
- LONG DAY.
- Class, lotsa homework, more class, coffee with the girls, Alice in Wonderland (ok movie)
- Brickstreet.
- Awesome.
- really productive
- Class
- Work
- Worked out/Ran
- Walked to CVS/Bank for errands
- Went to Hueston woods for a hike
- Learned to shoot a bow/arrow (I was tolerable...I didn't hurt myself or hurt anybody and had a few decent shots)
- Ate dinner w Josh's family
- Didn't feel all that great cus I was exhausted
- Attempted to nap -- failed
- Uptown for coffee
- wandered some
- then we all ended up at 45East upstairs.
- Another awesome night.
It's saturday...now what?
I am sleep deprived. Caffeinated.
I guess I should do homework. Then shower....and we'll see what tonight brings.
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Anxious about school/career/life
at Miami:
OR WORK, and GO BACK FOR PhD.
UGHHHH.
and Life? I'd like to have more of one soon...before I move to another location and like everybody else does so we're all separated.
- I am struggling a lot on exams in a class where I find the material easy to understand. Biochem. stupid. That is just ... not logical to me. I just suck at taking tests and need to figure it out PROMPTO.
- School is hard
- WHERE TO GO?
- HURRY UP AND TELL ME IF I GOT MONEY!
- How much am I going to make? I am trying to figure it out. From what I gather, starting salary (within one year) ranges from 33-78K. Pretty big range with room for improvement. I mean really, if I start out at like 33-40K...i REALLY do NOT want a huge loan if at all. I won't make enough to make it worth it. That's why this determines where I go to school.
OR WORK, and GO BACK FOR PhD.
UGHHHH.
and Life? I'd like to have more of one soon...before I move to another location and like everybody else does so we're all separated.
Indy art and food
Indianapolis Museum of Art: fun! took a LONG time to go through it all though...Highlight: The exhibit where a big blue rectangle thing looked like a canvas but was actually a hole in the wall. Awesome.
My navigational skills are awesome. Not really. But at least I knew what stuff was called...just not the location? It's ok, we eventually made loops of walking in the rain and found what we were looking for...right next to where we parked. Smart. Fun wandering though, even if parkin cost 8 dollars.
Dinner was awesome.
Rathskeller was pretty expensive for a lot of stuff but its an amazing environment, beautiful (huge) building, and amazing food. those pretzels really get to you...that mustard sauce stuff....made my nose BURNNN. good though.
You get out what you put in. Happiness does take some remote effort.
My navigational skills are awesome. Not really. But at least I knew what stuff was called...just not the location? It's ok, we eventually made loops of walking in the rain and found what we were looking for...right next to where we parked. Smart. Fun wandering though, even if parkin cost 8 dollars.
Dinner was awesome.
Rathskeller was pretty expensive for a lot of stuff but its an amazing environment, beautiful (huge) building, and amazing food. those pretzels really get to you...that mustard sauce stuff....made my nose BURNNN. good though.
You get out what you put in. Happiness does take some remote effort.
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Checklist for the end of SB
Thursday (today):
- Find more articles/resources for Soc term paper...so far it is much harder than anticipated and there are a lot of challenges coming up
- perhaps start studying for Zoo Lab exam...that I just today realized is Tuesday...or at least figure out what to study and plan
- Work on Graduate Student Instructor (GSI) applications for schools (esp. Michigan)
- maybe work on US Citizenship application -- yeah, I'm slow with this
- Hang out with Laura bc she comes home Friday, perhaps see Alice in Wonderland.
- Play with Luke
- GSI app
- Zoo Lab Exam
- Hopefully work on FAFSA cus it is due soon...
- Hopefully day trip to Clifty falls
- move back into Bishop Hall
- Homework
- STUDYING
- Desperate Housewives @9PM
- GSI App
the Self
I've just been feeling pretty down lately but I am making effort to just put the pieces together and to try not to let things get to me. I don't need the attention to feel better about myself but sometimes distance just makes it worse. No fun having more reasons to just feel moody especially when it is a vulnerable time to begin with. There are insecurities I need to confront and figure out. I need to learn how to react appropriately. But then again I keep on telling myself I should try to understand. I cannot expect to receive as much as I give even though that is logical. Equity and equality. Difference. People give in different ways even if the actions may go unnoticed and unappreciated. Maybe I am just not seeing the actions. Maybe I need to be more demanding.
Because I definitely don't want to just disappear.
But sometimes a hug is enough and is at least a start.
Because I definitely don't want to just disappear.
But sometimes a hug is enough and is at least a start.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
University of Michigan and sunshine
So weather is nice today after all. It isn't to rain until the evening or something.
Anyway, dad and I drove up to Ann Arbor yesterday. It was a really nice drive actually, I enjoyed it as I drove most of the way there and back. OMG MICHIGAN DRIVERS.Once we hit michigan speed limit went from 65 to 70...but, nobody was going under 80. I was going 80-85 and people were STILLLLL PASSING MEEE going at like 90 or so. hahahaha.
We got there at around noon and parked at the Cardiovascular Center then walked in search for lunch before meeting with the PH HBHE Student Coordinator. We didn't explore all that much because the place is huge and I was tired of walking but we had Panera. Not exciting but still a good way to observe the place as I stared out the window and observing the very studious environment of the restaurant itself.
Learned a good deal about the school from the Coordinator at the meeting. I mean they have scholarships available that they will send out soon but it is limited, as limited as GSI positions. I cannot really get them within the public health school but I can try to get them in other schools to be like a graduate student instructor. I looked into it and it does not look all that promising because they either rarely/never take from other departments or there aren't all that many options. I am going to continue trying to figure this out though, as well as try to find research. Although they would only pay hourly, that's better than nothing. There is no guarantee I will go to Michigan for school though. It is an amazing school but money is the limiting factor here. Columbus is a lot cheaper. I'm still trying to figure out how much effort I'll put towards Illinois-Chicago though. Gah...so much to do. I am attempting to make an appointment with somebody in Columbus to meet with sometime this week. I should also write two papers this week sometime, and finish FAFSA with my parents. I want to have fun too though...but when?
Life is going by too fast. Time is short. But I guess since the Chile earthquake the day has shortened slightly? something like that.
ahhhh......
*****
Update:
Michigan's Chemistry Department doesn't even post GSI's for non chemistry dept people...which does not work for me...that and they probably won't even need more to begin with...
I am waiting to hear from other Michigan depts that I am REMOTELY qualified for in terms of GSi positions.
Apparently OSU gives assistantships out without applications...so I don't do anything right now?
Chicago's assistantships look difficult to apply for because I have no experience...maybe I'll try anyway.
I also need to fill out the SOC one at Michigan tomorrow or so? Sigh...I do not have that much experience but I can sure try...
I can't be too picky though because my field does not pay all that much post-degree so finances do count. That and I am very lucky to have my parents helping because me taking out a ton of loans is not practical, considering I am not pursuing medicine or something which pays a lot right away (guaranteed). Sigh. Money isn't everything but sometimes it is.
Anyway, dad and I drove up to Ann Arbor yesterday. It was a really nice drive actually, I enjoyed it as I drove most of the way there and back. OMG MICHIGAN DRIVERS.Once we hit michigan speed limit went from 65 to 70...but, nobody was going under 80. I was going 80-85 and people were STILLLLL PASSING MEEE going at like 90 or so. hahahaha.
We got there at around noon and parked at the Cardiovascular Center then walked in search for lunch before meeting with the PH HBHE Student Coordinator. We didn't explore all that much because the place is huge and I was tired of walking but we had Panera. Not exciting but still a good way to observe the place as I stared out the window and observing the very studious environment of the restaurant itself.
Learned a good deal about the school from the Coordinator at the meeting. I mean they have scholarships available that they will send out soon but it is limited, as limited as GSI positions. I cannot really get them within the public health school but I can try to get them in other schools to be like a graduate student instructor. I looked into it and it does not look all that promising because they either rarely/never take from other departments or there aren't all that many options. I am going to continue trying to figure this out though, as well as try to find research. Although they would only pay hourly, that's better than nothing. There is no guarantee I will go to Michigan for school though. It is an amazing school but money is the limiting factor here. Columbus is a lot cheaper. I'm still trying to figure out how much effort I'll put towards Illinois-Chicago though. Gah...so much to do. I am attempting to make an appointment with somebody in Columbus to meet with sometime this week. I should also write two papers this week sometime, and finish FAFSA with my parents. I want to have fun too though...but when?
Life is going by too fast. Time is short. But I guess since the Chile earthquake the day has shortened slightly? something like that.
ahhhh......
*****
Update:
Michigan's Chemistry Department doesn't even post GSI's for non chemistry dept people...which does not work for me...that and they probably won't even need more to begin with...
I am waiting to hear from other Michigan depts that I am REMOTELY qualified for in terms of GSi positions.
Apparently OSU gives assistantships out without applications...so I don't do anything right now?
Chicago's assistantships look difficult to apply for because I have no experience...maybe I'll try anyway.
I also need to fill out the SOC one at Michigan tomorrow or so? Sigh...I do not have that much experience but I can sure try...
I can't be too picky though because my field does not pay all that much post-degree so finances do count. That and I am very lucky to have my parents helping because me taking out a ton of loans is not practical, considering I am not pursuing medicine or something which pays a lot right away (guaranteed). Sigh. Money isn't everything but sometimes it is.
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
2 til SB
Didn't get much sleep last night. Got home at like 1 or so AM and took a while to fall asleep. Woke up at 7AM. Good thing I didn't work today AND took a 2 hour nap so I could be rejuvenated to study for my exam(s).
Dad and I are officially going to visit U-Michigan on Monday. I'm very excited! If I go it's gonna be incredibly expensive but I bet I'd really like it there...although Chicago is fun too...sigh...
Rain ...Tuesday-Friday ugh. Even in Kentucky (RRG) where Josh wants to us to go for a day trip/camp. Another location perhaps?
Saw the cutest squirrel today. I've seen it many times at Upham Hall. It looks like the other Miami squirrels except its back and tail are auburn colored. It's little. It was playing with a branch on the ground...it would run up to it and climb over it and then swing on it to flip upside down to the other side as if he was on a monkey bar or something.
Right after I saw this I witnessed some girl back into a parked car. I waited in case I had to get her license plate number for the guy in the car but she came out to talk to him thankfully. It was an unpleasant crunching sound as her car was MUCH bigger than his.
Took my SOC exam today. I think it went well. I am having trouble focusing for Zoo and Biochem Lab final. Ugh. I stare.
Tomorrow I'm gonna go uptown with Jennie once Biochem Lab final is over for GBD, then we both have to be productive again...well she definitely does, I just should...but may not, I don't know...
Update:
GBD was awesome. uptown at like 3pm, and like 10pm.
Dad and I are officially going to visit U-Michigan on Monday. I'm very excited! If I go it's gonna be incredibly expensive but I bet I'd really like it there...although Chicago is fun too...sigh...
Rain ...Tuesday-Friday ugh. Even in Kentucky (RRG) where Josh wants to us to go for a day trip/camp. Another location perhaps?
Saw the cutest squirrel today. I've seen it many times at Upham Hall. It looks like the other Miami squirrels except its back and tail are auburn colored. It's little. It was playing with a branch on the ground...it would run up to it and climb over it and then swing on it to flip upside down to the other side as if he was on a monkey bar or something.
Right after I saw this I witnessed some girl back into a parked car. I waited in case I had to get her license plate number for the guy in the car but she came out to talk to him thankfully. It was an unpleasant crunching sound as her car was MUCH bigger than his.
Took my SOC exam today. I think it went well. I am having trouble focusing for Zoo and Biochem Lab final. Ugh. I stare.
Tomorrow I'm gonna go uptown with Jennie once Biochem Lab final is over for GBD, then we both have to be productive again...well she definitely does, I just should...but may not, I don't know...
Update:
GBD was awesome. uptown at like 3pm, and like 10pm.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Waking up Angry
No, I am not angry right now but I was when I was awoken at like 1am by the fire alarm when I had been asleep for an hour and was having a very nice dream that I have no shot at remembering. Upon waking up I started yelling angrily, I don't remember what I said, but eventually my roommate figured out it was the fire alarm from that because she didn't know what it was. I ended up outside in flipflops...but at least I managed to put on pj pants over shorts, and wear a coat, and bring my purse with keys/phone. Wanted to make sure our door was locked so nothing was stolen. Then from the third floor it was pretty crowded tryin to get out. It was pretty chilly.
Outside, we all crowded on the sidewalk because nobody wants to stand in the snow in slippers and such. Some people were really annoying with intense hyper-ness. I might've found that annoying because I was annoyed to have been awoken to begin with. Some people were dressed funny....One guy had just gotten out of the shower so he was in a robe, but put on jeans, and then a jacket. It looked like he was wearing a skirt and then he had a blanket on his head. I wish I had brought my blanket, or had worn shoes but I couldn't really see.
Turns out it was just some girl down the hall on my floor who had burnt something in the microwave. She was really upset about it. She is probably unaware of how common it is. I think she's an international student from China? I can't tell, she never talks and I didn't even know she lived like 3 doors down from me.
There was this other girl that annoyed me. She normally never says anything but she wouldn't stop talking and laughing hysterically. And she thought the fire alarm detected flames. No. At least that's part of a fire...
I had trouble going back to sleep because my roommate kept on getting up and opening/closing the door...so I've lost 2 hours of sleep...from being outside and not being able to fall asleep. I am not particularly happy about that. Now I can't even fall back asleep even though I have some time. Ugh.
At least today should be a relatively easy day apart from all the studying and class/lab.
I hate fire alarms.
EDIT:
Later this morning I was reading something online and something said "put a ring on it." I think it had to do with the finale of The Bachelor but it reminded me what part of my dream was about. Josh sent some present in a box (I think) and I opened it to find two of the most hideous rings ever. They were gold (which is fine) but it looked like an old woman's brooch stuck on it. Maybe not as elaborate but nevertheless ugly. I was just perplexed. Not really upset, but really confused. The prettier one was too big and the uglier one fit my finger properly. maybe there was some sort of scheme behind it. Either way, they were hideous and it was a funny dream and my friends were trying to figure out what the deal was with it. Then the fire alarm woke me up so I have no idea what anything meant. Maybe I'm too particular but I bet most people would not want to wear these rings because the "bling"/design on it was HUGE. Like the width of my finger. ha ha ha.
Outside, we all crowded on the sidewalk because nobody wants to stand in the snow in slippers and such. Some people were really annoying with intense hyper-ness. I might've found that annoying because I was annoyed to have been awoken to begin with. Some people were dressed funny....One guy had just gotten out of the shower so he was in a robe, but put on jeans, and then a jacket. It looked like he was wearing a skirt and then he had a blanket on his head. I wish I had brought my blanket, or had worn shoes but I couldn't really see.
Turns out it was just some girl down the hall on my floor who had burnt something in the microwave. She was really upset about it. She is probably unaware of how common it is. I think she's an international student from China? I can't tell, she never talks and I didn't even know she lived like 3 doors down from me.
There was this other girl that annoyed me. She normally never says anything but she wouldn't stop talking and laughing hysterically. And she thought the fire alarm detected flames. No. At least that's part of a fire...
I had trouble going back to sleep because my roommate kept on getting up and opening/closing the door...so I've lost 2 hours of sleep...from being outside and not being able to fall asleep. I am not particularly happy about that. Now I can't even fall back asleep even though I have some time. Ugh.
At least today should be a relatively easy day apart from all the studying and class/lab.
I hate fire alarms.
EDIT:
Later this morning I was reading something online and something said "put a ring on it." I think it had to do with the finale of The Bachelor but it reminded me what part of my dream was about. Josh sent some present in a box (I think) and I opened it to find two of the most hideous rings ever. They were gold (which is fine) but it looked like an old woman's brooch stuck on it. Maybe not as elaborate but nevertheless ugly. I was just perplexed. Not really upset, but really confused. The prettier one was too big and the uglier one fit my finger properly. maybe there was some sort of scheme behind it. Either way, they were hideous and it was a funny dream and my friends were trying to figure out what the deal was with it. Then the fire alarm woke me up so I have no idea what anything meant. Maybe I'm too particular but I bet most people would not want to wear these rings because the "bling"/design on it was HUGE. Like the width of my finger. ha ha ha.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)