How far is too far? How to stay on the same page?

I'm very thankful to have received a lot of responses from potential employers. I have finished 3 interviews (the process) and have two more set up with two different employers.

This past weekend was great and I learned so much about myself, the real world, and what I want.

Although I found the job I interviewed for this weekend "by accident" it is an amazing accident. It's in a field I am unfamiliar with or would not have thought I would enjoy but after the (very long) interview, I came out feeling very relieved and enthusiastic and I hope they feel the same way about me. I should hear back from them in about 1.5 weeks more from now.

I have an interview this coming Monday (a friend is interviewing for the same position). THis would not require relocating and it does sound interesting at least, maybe not as exciting as the job before but certainly worth a try and it's always good to have opportunities.

After work I received another call for another position but the interview isn't til April. Although a month ago I would've decided that would've been the best for me, I realize I want something that is really stimulating/fun/challenging without all the tedious bureaucracy but if it comes down to it, I may check it out if I have not accepted an offer by then.

A decision is a decision and one must follow through and be responsible.

Also... now comes to the question of how far is too far? Josh and I live 2 hours apart right now and so far that has been OK and has probably been good for us at this stage in our lives to figure out what we want in a career. I know he wants to work somewhere with an automobile industry but I don't know how I feel about some of those cities. Also, the job I interviewed this weekend is amazing for the future due to its flexibility and manageability when comes time to have a family.

We have a lot to talk about still and figure out. But, that'll happen soon enough becomes he comes up to visit tomorrow for the weekend! hooray! :-D

Dress for the job you Want.

So ready for the upcoming interviews :)

Thanks goes to The Limited's $100 off Suit sale and TJ Maxx for the great purse/wallet set!

Good day

Found my dream job at ODH, well I think it is my dream job. Applied... we'll see how this goes because...Unions do exist.

Got to sit in on interview, that was fun.

Got pretty good with mail-merging. I enjoy being efficient!

Had caffeine.

Told that I get to take charge of all our print materials/media yayyy! I get to be creative, yay!

Meeting with the director of Obesity at ODH tomorrow, more interviews, meetings...and then I have my second phone screening for a job! ahhh!!! time flies. AHHH CAFFEINE.

Mindful Living: Making time for a bucket list

From Huffington Post's Mindful Living :

"If we look into our lives, we will see clearly how many
unimportant tasks, so called 'responsibilities' accumulate
to fill them up. One master compares them to 'housekeeping
in a dream.' We tell ourselves we want to spend time on the
important things of life, but there never is any time." -- Tibetan teacher Sogyal Rinpoche

This is too true, especially for me.

What would I do if I had enough time? (Maybe I can implement these things a little at a time, deliberately, through my life - and MAKE time because I am sure most of the stuff on my "to-do" list probably aren't CRUCIAL, I just think they are because that's part of who I am...anxious...worried...and overly productive?).

1. Have a dog
2. Paint a mural on a wall
3. Zip-Lining
4. Travel to Europe
5. Visit Tibet
6. Explore Australia (See Kangaroos in their natural environment!)
7. Go to Kenya and see Giraffes in their natural environment
8. Have a pet domesticated fox
9. Really get into shape
10. Visit P.E.I., Canada
11. Go on a Cruise
12. Disneyland
13. Go to California
14. Climb a Mountain
15. See Northern Lights
16. Cherry Blossoms in Japan
17. Learn to properly drive a manual car
18. Learn to swim better

I am sure there is more, but this is what I've come up with off the top of my head.

February

Had a wonderful Valentines Day, the third one together! Before he came to visit I made an absolutely delicious cake. It took 2 evenings to make it and I don't have a blender so it even gave me a nice arm work out, hah.

This is the

Blackberry Red Wine and Chocolate Cake

He definitely approved and said it's better than any grocery store cake he's had :-P . You know, that is pretty good as far as I am concerned but I'd go as far as to say it's one of the best cakes I've tasted, personally. I am a very big fan of raspberries and chocolate.

We also went to see the Blue Man Group with Trish and Brian. It was fun dressing up. My new peep toe shoes had their first time out. The only down side is they didn't quite fit right and I hadn't been able to get my foot petals yet to have them fit comfortably and properly. So... my toes were very uncomfortable and they would slip... but, I still think it was worth it as I looked pretty awesome as a walking disco ball. That's how I felt anyway. Black full sequen tank and bandage blue mini skirt. It was a cold evening, but I cannot control the weather and I really wanted to wear sequins! It felt so appropriate for Blue Man Group! and I enjoyed being a disco ball in my room and Josh and I got a kick out of the sun reflecting off of me onto all the walls and the ceiling in my room. I tried to take a picture of it but it didn't come out but you can imagine what it looked like anyway. It was a great evening and we barely made it into the show on time. They are so hilarious! such comedians! it was like a party in there! Improv, Silly String, Paint, Giant colorful glowing weather balloon like things bouncing around...butt shaking. We laughed the entire time.

That was such a great weekend of just time to spend together and we also found good deals at Eddie Bauer Outlet near my apartment. That's probably the most excitement I'll have this month.

Life isn't super exciting but I have a lot to be thankful for.

I need to stop shopping though. Recently I found these awesome espadrilles from TJ Maxx:

They are a half size too big but that
was all they had and it does fit Ok! Especially with my foot petals :) They are cute, over half off, and
are just the type of shoes I've been looking for. I am now on the look out for well-priced(aka cheap but of good quality) purse to go with it and I've been on the look out for a good cream or camel colored trench coat for spring.

Now I've mostly just got class, culminating, and work. Not much else.

Essentially what I learned this week in class about aromatherapy is that the essential oils from Bath and Body (and just about any major commercialized oils) are essentially crap. They are the leftovers from the therapeutic grade oils. I could smell a huge difference between the yucky lavender and the good stuff. I could never figure out why the lavender lotions and stuff made me feel nauseous because this stuff smelled so clean and pure. The guest speaker talked to us a lot about energy fields and stuff and explained that dogs (and other animals) have super sensitive energy fields and absorb the energy fields of their humans. Which essentially means that Molly is a nervous wreck because Josh must have some anxiety that has not been healed (or one of the other of us who interact with her... if that is the case, it is probably my fault...). Regardless of which human (if it is a human's fault at all.. I mean really) if this woman could "fix" Molly... I think I'd buy into it. I mean I'd probably be impressed if she got Molly to even voluntarily come near her at all... or not be scared of the dishwasher... or the world. Fun class . Some of the stuff seems silly, some really interesting and useful, and some is way over my head. I am clearly not a pharmacy student... or else that midterm exam would have gone a lot better.

Oh, my roommate borrowed her adviser's dog on Saturday. Cute dog. yapper. dog got to go to the mall. My roommate is definitely not ready to actually have a dog though...it's not hopeless but it'll take some work first.

Well...what's next? I need to stop shopping. I plan on making Panda Bread ! haha So fun! Trish is coming over on Sunday so we can bake these. Hmm... I need to work more on my culminating, I need to exercise more...I'm excited to see Josh the beginning of March. Ah, life...even though not much is going on I still appreciate what is going on at least.

Not the greatest of days

Well, the morning wasn't too bad. I got to dawdle a lot this morning. I'm so used to waking up at 6am for Tuesday-Friday so it was just natural for me to wake up at 6am on Monday even though I don't have to be on campus until 8AM. The morning was nice... I'm glad I got to enjoy an hour because the rest of the day surely wasn't very fun.

I did not enjoy my dentist appointment at all. I've had a couple cavities filled before but this is the first time I got so numbed up with those needles. I'm not sure it was necessary but the whole process was much more uncomfortable than I remember and I was phlegmy and gaggy. I'm glad it was eventually over but by that point I couldn't feel my mouth, tongue, or cheeks. Dentist said it'd be gone in another hour...2 hours later...still can't feel anything so that meant I couldn't eat. By then I was sooo hungry...

Group meeting for my Pharmacy class was alright. It was productive. Sort of had to take the lead. Maybe it was my crazy sugar level from lack of eating that made me just want to get it all over with.

I eventually felt well enough to eat...even after I ...stupidly...attempted to eat some food even tho I can't feel anything. It was risky. I wouldn't have been able to feel biting my tongue or cheeks. Anyway, that went ok...and I eventually ate. Yay...not very much though because then I had class...then had to walk back to meet with my adviser.

Emma and I walked in the rain. Sideways rain. Soaking wet. Cold. .. then sat to figure out some stats stuff with adviser who sent me home with a long list of things to run thru SAS. This isn't going to be very fun but I got a head start on it when I got home... so hopefully I'll be able to finish it all soon.

Being physically uncomfortable and having gloomy weather did not help my mood. It's not that I never see people but I still feel lonely at times. Even when I make plans to see people, it's like something is missing.

I realize that even though it was sweet that somebody opened the door for me on Saturday (not even the door he was meant to go thru)... I was overwhelmed by the gesture. I realize it's just within the normal range of nice things to do but I guess I'm just craving such gestures. Looking back on it now... even though at the time it made me so happy... now it makes me sad.

It's lonely out here. I can only imagine how lonely I'd be if I moved farther away.

I want to feel special and adored.

May be why I am watching The Bachelor right now. Ah, always a dreamer.

A new year, a different year

I'm sitting here in my cubicle at work. It is so warm in here and this is really not helping with my feeling slow. I had a lot of trouble waking up this morning, even though I got 8 hours of sleep. I suppose it does not make up for my troubled sleep, physically not feeling all that great, and my just generally feeling drained.

Research/Culminating consuming my brain,

Work is consuming my energy,

and Job searching/applying is consuming my time.

What do I have left? Some pretty amazing people in my life!

I haven't written in here in quite some time now...not for the lack of anything to say, but mostly the lack of time/energy to think of putting my thoughts into words.

Winter break was nice. Different. There was no snow, it was pretty mild, and I enjoyed my time with my loved ones.

Both my brother and I felt rather poorly so we spent many day just lounging on my bed watching movies. Sometimes he would feel so awful he'd pass out and it was so depressing to see how miserable he felt.

I enjoyed being around friends and I got to spend a lot of time with Josh and my family.

Christmas was nice. I'd say my favorite is the gift Josh made for me. He put a lot of time, energy, and resources into it and it means a lot to me. I haven't had it for very long now, but it already holds a lot of meaning to me. Here it is!:

It is made of my favorite wood: Tiger maple! It is beautiful.

Look at the grain! so wavy! and it is shiny. After a few more coats of oil it can go out into the living room and I will feel more at ease. Best thing? Josh will be spending the weekend here!!! that is the best part... it is the perk that he will be applying this oil so I don't somehow screw it up. I am very protective of my gift.

Ok, moving past Christmas. New Years was chill enough. We spent time with Allie and her bf, Austin and went to Lauren's place in Hamilton to bring in the New Year with some of our friends. It was nice to see Fei and Seth, and Jocelyn! Certainly better than last year, which was a disaster, but I would rather not think about it again.

So, now I am back in Columbus. I am trying to be financially self-sufficient and I see that it will not be easy. I'm working a lot, working on culminating which is consuming my life. SAS is such a pain, and it is so difficult to program mostly because it is hard to really sort out an appropriate way to sort and analyze the data because there are so many variables and conditions to consider to try and answer the research question. I will not delve into that here because if everybody attempts to read it, they will probably want to pass out too.

Thankfully, my adviser is going to stick around in May/June to help me with the final stages of my culminating and be there for my defense. Otherwise, I'd be presenting at my defense with her on video-chat on Skype, haha. Either way, in March/April we will be working on my culminating with our meetings through Skype. Pretty cool, eh?

I've been applying to jobs like crazy. I applied to 17 yesterday. I have 4 more that I have printed out that I will apply to today. I am trying not to rush myself and really spend some time carefully writing my resumés and cover letters. I'm just so anxious about this whole process. There are like.... no Epi jobs in Ohio...none that I am qualified for yet. The ones I am qualified for... the closest one is Marshfield, Wisconsin. That is North of Lacrosse. That is... northern Wisconsin. Oh boy. But, I'm trying not to concern myself too much with this because... well, applying to a job is free so apart from time/energy I am not losing anything in applying to absolutely everything...everywhere. I will figure it out in like May or so ... after I have hopefully received interviews, etc. I don't want to be too far away. This is something I need to seriously address. If I have to be far away it better pay enough and be flexible enough that I could come back to Ohio like once a month for a few days. I don't think I can handle that far a distance very well (in a place, all alone!) from Josh and my brother. My brother is growing up quickly and I don't want to miss out. Josh means the world to me and I couldn't bear to be away so far while we are both too busy.

But, for now, I will try to focus on the present because... heck, there is way too much going on for me to spend worrying about things I cannot control. It's time to go into over-drive to multi-task my life.

School.

Work.

Thesis.

Future.

Life.

Time to get back to work, I'm feeling a little more energetic now.